I floated down the Boise River yesterday, and I gotta tell you, it’s a damn good time. If you’ve never been to Boise before, the Boise River meanders right through the middle of the city. It’s not the biggest river; on the contrary, it’s a lazy, traipsing river that cuts right by Boise State’s blue-turf stadium, the heart of downtown, and into Boise’s beautiful park system. I’m pretty sure people have been doing this for a long time, because I know my own pappy did it when he was a kid. There’s three man-made waterfalls to spice things up, a couple of bridges to jump off, and a couple of rope swings to jump in and get all the bitches wet. In fact, the Boise Parks System installed Barber Park at the top of the river whose sole purpose was to cater to the river-going crowd, complete with free air pumps, unloading and parking of vehicles, and a couple of drink dispensers.

So about eight of us go float the river, and we have a couple of small rafts and three kayaks. We tie ‘em together, cast off, and as soon as we made the first turn, we cracked open the alcohol.

Because no river-floating trip is complete without the requisite Fade-arade and Sparks. And because the river is part of Boise’s public park system, no alcohol is tolerated in the river or in any surrounding parks. But fuck that, we’re having fun.

We’re evenly matched – there’s four girls and four guys, and we start having a good time. In fact, we start having a really fucking merry time.

The hot Russian is back. And this time, she’s in a string bikini. Her boyfriend (who outweighs my ass by about thirty pounds) is in one of the kayaks, keeping a close eye. Because she’s getting drunk. And she’s super fucking hot. And there’s four dudes eyeing her.

Somehow, she’s charged with the responsibility of manning a paddle, and I start fearing for my life. The river twists and turns, and gets going pretty fast in some areas. And if you don’t know how to navigate, your raft/tube gets fucked up in the sharp bushes along the edge. I’ve seen many drunk asses forget to paddle towards the middle and come shit outta luck when their tube pops in the middle of the river. Cause that means yo ass is walkin’.

So the drunk Russkie is sucking at the paddling, and I keep grabbing the paddle from her at critical moments, because I’d rather get fucked in the ass than have to hump two wet, deflated rafts down the side of the river with four girls yelling at my ass. Russkie’s gettin’ pissed, because she believes in her heart of hearts that she can navigate like Lincoln, while everybody else is trying to convince her to just give the paddle to me. I finally grab it, and she gets pissed and tackles me full-on over the side of the raft and into the river.

And the water’s at least forty below zero. Well, not quite, but it was fucking cold enough to catch my testicles’ attention. Let’s just say I’m still waitin’ for my balls to drop. So we’re in the river, and she cops a feel while her man’s out of sight on his kayak. She looks at me with a mischievous grin, and we climb back in. She lays out on the raft. Her body’s forming beads of water because of the tanning lotion, and the little drops slip and slide exquisitely off her absolutely perfect curves.

Jesus. I can only imagine what it’d be like to fuck this specimen. But I divagate.

Pretty soon, everybody’s pushing each other into the river, and we’re having a blast. Russkie jumps off a rope-swing, and swims over to the raft. Minus her top. The girls start yelling, and her friend jumps in to cover her (beautiful, perky, round) tits up. Of course she doesn’t care; she’s fucking hammered and smilin’ from ear to ear like a fucking ignoramus. With perfect tits. Her boyfriend retrieves the top at light speed with his little kayak, and meanwhile everybody’s laughing their asses off.

By the time we got done, this girl had kicked me in the balls while I was standing up (for no other apparent reason other than to get my attention), fell off a kayak at least three times, and touched me in one form or another right around 1,139 times. And her boyfriend was noticing.

We get off at the exit park where our cars are parked, and her boyfriend pulls her aside for a little stern talking-to. I can only imagine what he’s saying. Next thing you know, they’re both storming off. In separate directions. And the Russkie is walking straight towards me.

Uh oh. It’s on.

She hops on the back, and we take off on my Ninja. Her hands make sure to cover every inch of my taut stomach and chest, a couple times playing with the waist line. I can feel her perky, round tits pressed real hard against my back. Needless to say, I was having small amounts of trouble keeping a straight line on the bike.

We burst into my bedroom, and we’re kissing desperately. I barely manage to kick the door closed when she rips my shorts off and starts going to work on me.

And she’s fucking going to town. I can tell she’s never seen one this big. I don’t know what they teach these girls in school in Russia, but this girl’s brains are sending chills to my penis till I feel like a genious (Fabolous). She’s waxin’ my dick with real fervor, and I can’t take it anymore. I pick her back up and throw her on the bed and rip her bikini off. She’s perfectly tan all the way around – nary a tan line. Her breasts are marvels in anatomy, and her stomach is flatter than my walls.

She’s absolutely perfect. And she’s lookin’ at me with those eyes. I look up at the sky, give a silent thanks, and throw it in like there ain’t no tomorrow. Her face contorts into a mixed expression of surprise and lust as I enter her. I can tell she’s feeling every last fucking inch of my madness.

Good Lord. It takes all of my concentration to keep from exploding over every wall and ceiling within a two-block radius. This girl is working me from above, her hands on my chest, gripping my pecs and squeezing my nipples. Then she gets down and starts sucking on me again, and starts alternating between bobbing on my dick and fucking me.

Then she gets up and lays down on the floor, with her back and legs propped straight up against the bed. She then slowly spreads her legs into a split, and motions me to come over there. This girl must be a fucking gymnast, too! I turn around and start throwing into her, and it’s the most insanely… “good” feeling I’ve ever had. I can’t even describe it.

It was like a fucking miracle. A straight-up revelation. In fact, I revelate all over her. Everywhere. My balls won’t stop.

I wipe her off, and she lays naked on top of me. She’s looking at me with eyes of satisfaction, and – dare I say it – love.

I think we might finally have something here.

By Robert Shagwell | Jul 13, 2005 | Permalink |